If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
