VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
