all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
