yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Randomize
