Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
