reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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