Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
