love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
