We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i may or may not be watching the land before time
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
