...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
is wine microwaveable?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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