that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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