So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize