I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
