I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
She's not a foreskin expert like you
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
