Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize