More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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