i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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