If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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