I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
