guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
