He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
