Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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