Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
