doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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