Sponge bath it is.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
