Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Mom said you looked used
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
