My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Help. Why am I so naked?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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