Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i came on her dog
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
