How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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