NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
