I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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