i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
