hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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