yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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