normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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