Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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