If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
