i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize