hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
