it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
