Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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