hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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