I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize