it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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