so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Randomize
