i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
