she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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