do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
