I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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