Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Randomize
